The Dark Knight is a Loser: And That's a Good Thing!

I just saw The Dark Knight and I have to say, this movie will be a loser.

What do I mean? Well, in the race that is the summer box office tallies of 2008 this new Batman movie will not win. Why? It’s not because it’s not an excellent film (it is). It’s not because, it doesn’t have the best performances of any film I’ve seen so far this year (it does – EVERYONE brings their “A” game). And it’s not because it doesn’t have the high-octane spectacle of the other super-competition (it’s got action in spades).

No, the reason The Dark Knight will lose the summer box office competition is because it is too true.

Indy and Iron man are quintessential summer escapism and their grosses will reflect it. That’s what people want this time of year. They want to get away and forget about life for two hours. The Dark Knight offers no such respite.

Even more so than Wall-E (an excellent 90 minute meditation on what it means to be human), The Dark Knight tells the truth about the real struggle between good and evil in all of humanity, how tempting it can be to give in to the latter in service of the former and just how high the stakes are in this whole thing. I was moved to tears several time by this film because it hit so close to home. We had all better listen, see and pay attention.

Furthermore, The Dark Knight is the quintessential post-9/11 superhero movie. I’m not sure this story, even as it borrows from some of my favorite ‘80’s Batman books, would have the resonance it does in a pre-9/11 world. When they talk about the Joker being a terrorist there’s a great double ring going on. I hope it’s not lost on the audience. While we watch Batman and Harvey Dent struggle with what it means to defeat the evil and chaos of the Joker, I couldn’t shake the fact that both Abu-Graib and Guantanamo Bay had been in the news just 24 hours earlier. I know Captain America addressed the war on terror in his comics a few years ago, but this movie is doing something altogether different. Pay attention to the way the Joker is finally defeated. This movie is asking what way, truth and life are as we negotiate our current global crisis. Again, I hope everyone is listening and Christians are making the connections.

All this is why a movie this good (it’s going to make 10 best lists for 2008 and may receive Oscar nods - if you care about that sort of thing), deep and true couldn’t make huge bank. And that’s OK. Verizon tie-ins and action figures be damned, I’m glad Christopher Nolan doesn’t care. He’s made a movie where Batman might not just save Gotham, but our real world as well. Those who have ears let them hear.

Peace,
D

One Year Later...

The blog has been silent for the past two weeks because the following post has been haunting me. It is a post reflecting on the anniversary of my brother’s death. I know that writing it will do me some good, but it’s an emotional drain. I had to wait to post it, because part of my process (as you’ll see below) is not memorialize Ed’s life on the day of his death. But waiting means this thing has preoccupied me. So, if you’re willing to be part of my experience of grief and healing please read on. If not, wait a week and come back. I’ll probably have Batman reviews up or something I’m sure.

Here goes…

The end of last month marked the anniversary of a day I have no desire to distinguish, the day my brother Edward took his own life. His death was a suicide so the coming and going of the day he did it marks the end of a year of walking through anniversaries, memories, rituals and traditions all recast in the shadow of this dark event. To this end, passing the one-year mark has felt a little like crossing the finish line. There are no more yearly rituals to go through without him. We are finally moving on.

I was with my parents on the day but couldn’t quite decide how to handle it. It’s not as if this day is more sad than any other since it happened. But we wondered, “Do you say something, or do you not?” “Do you call family and friends, or don’t you?” “Do have a day alone in private mourning or do you get out and do something celebratory as a way of redeeming the wound left in all our hearts?” (We did this – hiking with the kids and a picnic was great.) “Is email too impersonal a way to express my care?” I imagine our extended family and friends wondered the very same things in regard to corresponding with us.

What we did come to was ultimately pretty simple. We decided not to mark the day of Ed’s death in any big elaborate way at all. Instead, we recognized that it was ‘what it was’; talked about how we were feeling and sat with one another as the lull of late afternoon gave way to some tears. We didn’t do any kind of ritual or “official” remembrance at all and it seemed really right.

I think the reason for this is that the day I remember my brother, at least for me, should not be the day of his death. I know for many folks the day-of-death is a helpful anniversary when the departed can be missed, remembered fondly and their life celebrated.

“Wow, can you believe it’s been a year since grandma passed.”
“Boy I miss her.”
“Remember all the good times?”
What a great life she led.”

…This sort of thing.

But with Ed it’s a little more complicated. His death being a suicide and all, I don’t think I’m ready to “celebrate his life” yet. I’m still pretty hurt, sad and angry. His life was also pretty tragic so it’s not as if I want everything back like it was, or ‘one more day’ with Ed or anything like that. But things were getting better with him and we all had so much hope. That’s makes this all the more a kick in the gut – it’s not just the loss of the person we’re grieving but also the death of our hope for him as well. Like I said, complicated.

That being said, I think the day we’ll celebrate Ed’s life will be his birthday. This should be the time to tell good stories and, albeit bittersweet, remember the life of my brother. I’m not sure how long it will take us to get there, but I am confident we will.

Finally, the photo above is a bone box. In Jesus' day, one year after someone died their family would return to the tomb, collect their bones (now free of all flesh) and put them in a bone box for final internment. After grieving through the rhythm of a whole year without the departed it's time to visit them again and, as a family, put them to rest. That year long time line makes sense to me in a new way after this process but we're not yet ready for our bone box. Our process is a little stilted because of the circumstance. However as I said before, I think we'll get there. That bone box is what I'm shooting for.

Thanks for reading. It feels good to say it and looking forward to moving on.

Peace and love,
Dixon

Self Aggrandizing Vacation Photos!

Photo's from our Durango trip last week.

It was a great time!

D


Kristin and I at Mesa Verde. Fishing at Lake Andrews.

The kids in La Plata Canyon.

Me fording a river in the jeep!

Anybody recognize my hat?

Biking the Sabbath

I live in a neighborhood in Nashville where there are lots of orthodox Jewish families. Every Saturday I see them walking down streets that were not made for foot traffic, to practice a way a being that is counter to most of the cultures in which it is observed. I see them walking to synagogue to pray on the sabbath. This ritual of walking to synagogue has deep roots and exists in part to declare to the surrounding culture that there is a better way of being human - and this is it! This way of Torah and it's requirement of sabbath shows the best way to be in rhythm with the Creator God. Furthermore, by walking to prayers each sabbath day the Jewish people make visible their obedience to God, proclaiming that there is more to life than work. 

Why do I bring this up? 

Well, for the last month and change I have been biking home from work. Because I live about 16 miles away from my office and my fair city is not built for foot traffic this involves riding a bike on a few roads that were designed only for cars. While this is dangerous indeed, there is a understanding on certain through fares that cars and bikes should share the road, each making room for the other. This is a symbiosis I greatly appreciate, especially when the cars are"making room" for me by blowing by at 55-mph.

I didn't always feel this way. Before I started riding (and you should see me in the riding get-up by the way. I can't be taken seriously;) bikers were a nuisance. They were at best an obstacle and at worst my enemy. 

"Get out of the way!"

"You're so selfish, hoggin'' the road like that!"

"Can't you see I'm late?"

Seriously, I found myself wondering not if it was morally wrong to tailgate a rider, but whether or not it was effective. "Do you think it will work? I don't know let's try." I also intentionally ignored how my on-the-road communication habits (cell phone) were putting people's lives at risk. 

Imagine how my attitude changed once I became the vulnerable one on two wheels. But that's not my point...

When I see bikers on the road now they are kind of like those Jewish families in my neighborhood walking to sabbath. The presence of a biker on the road reminds me of a better more sustainable way to live. I'm not just talking about the health benefits of riding verses walking either. I'm talking about the way seeing a biker now reminds me to slow down and take my time. I am reminded that life is about more than my schedule. I'm reminded that driving this car is a bizarre way to be human (at least in the scope of human history) and it changes how I am required to care for my body and how many calories I should put in it. I reminded that I always seem to be in a rush. In this way riders are calling me to a more Godly way to be - a sabbath if you will - much like my Jewish neighbors.

Now, I realize there is really no comparison between a Millennia old spiritual practice that is deeply tied into the cultural identity of an entire people group and my recreation habits. But I just did it. For better or worse, this is how I saw it today.

Remember in the sabbath day and keeping it holy. Oh, and stop talking on your cell phone in the car,

D

Enter the Dojo

Hey, if you're looking for me this week I'm in San Francisco doing the Jesus Dojo again with my community.

Link here if you want to follow our exploits. We're trying to post once a day.

Peace,

Dixon

(on break in China town yesterday)

Got a Bite...

We heard back from the publisher yesterday and they are interested in one of the ideas I proposed!

Kind of exciting. I am in the process of generating a full proposal and selling them on my platform. It's the latter of the two that will be most challenging but I'm hopeful.

I may be writing a book this year after all. Who'd a thunk it.

Peace,
D

Book Stuff: The Latest

Alright race fans here's the update; almost a full year after getting turned down I've got two new books ideas written up and headed to an editorial board meeting this Tuesday.

The process of writing has been one of the hardest things I've ever done. Not because arranging sentences is so difficult (I mean it is, but that's not my point) but because this process is making me face a lot of my fears, doubts and insecurities - and that's just in generating the sample content;) So, we'll see how this all shakes out. My agent and I met with the acquisitions editor of a major Christian publisher who is excited about the possibilities.

I think I am too.

Here we go again.

Peace,
D